So I was thinking about something someone told me once not that long ago, we were standing together and the sun was shining through the clouds and making beams of light shine down on the city below us. I said it was pretty, he said it was little pieces of heaven shining through to show us hope for when we loose it. At this statement I laughed bitterly and said I don’t believe in heaven. That was a few months ago, and I haven’t seen that boy since then, and I doubt I’ll ever see him again, but I’d like to think we will always be friends, even if he has already forgotten. He also told me everyone was made of a color, and it could change, it just depended who you were right then. To this I laughed foolishly, and said people weren’t colors, and people never changed. You see, this boy was full of good things to say, and I was full of excuses and bitterness. When we were walking together on a nice day, he told me I had to enjoy being young, and live for the little things, cause when I’m older, I might forget them. To this I laughed solemnly, wondering if just maybe this time he was right, but instead I told him none of this would matter when we died.

Recently everything went bad for me, and I felt trapped, suffocated. But then I thought about everything that has happened since then and one night I was talking to a sister, related not by blood, simply by love, and in a final act of desperation, I asked if heaven was real. She said she’d like to think so, and now I am starting to think so too, and now I look back to the bitter laugh, and I regret not hugging him and saying he was absolutely right.

And I thought about it, and I think people do have a color, and I thought about my life, and my worst enemy turned best friend, and thought maybe people do change. I look back to the foolish laugh, and wish instead I would have nodded, and told him he was gold, because he was golden.

So today I am blue, not because I’m sad, but because the sky is blue, and so were his eyes, and I’d like to think my heaven will be blue, and my friends will be there.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll be red, like fire. Ready to burn and make memories and get to the highs of life again. Because in the end, when I look upon the solemn laugh, I should have laughed loudly, ans remembered the high of that single moment, because he was right yet again,

get ready

get set

cause ladies and gentlemen

here comes the rest of our lives.



Thank you Travis, for everything.